My feelings were justified when I saw two sweet babies and no heartbeats. One measuring 9w1d and one measuring 7w5d.
I'll be honest, I left the appointment in disbelief and praying for a miracle. The ultrasound tech was so flustered herself, I had a lot of unanswered questions and doubts. I went home and broke the news to the kids and began asking people to pray that the ultrasound (abdominal) was wrong. I said , who needs a push for canonization?? Fulton Sheen and Mother Theresa (who I've mentioned is very special to me)! Of course, those two will be canonized in their own time but I figured it couldn't hurt to ask.
With the miscarriage of Frances earlier this year, I was prepared for it. Being surprised by twins (I had no idea) and finding out there were no heartbeats all at once was doubly devastating. Oh how I would have loved two babies! I had already been dreaming of kissing sweet baby cheeks.
A follow up ultrasound on Friday confirmed that there were no heartbeats. By this time, I was thankful for the closure. The babies were born on Monday the 23rd.
As a cute antidote.... Peter has called this baby" Speedmotor from the very beginning. Speedmotor sometimes called dad before he left for work and even sometimes sent "presents". So we are very affectionately naming one of the babies Benedict Fulton Speedmotor and one Catherine Theresa.
(found on EWTN here).
My Lord, the baby is dead!
Why, my Lord—dare I ask why? It will not hear the whisper of the wind or see the beauty of its parents’ face—it will not see the beauty of Your creation or the flame of a sunrise. Why, my Lord?
“Why, My child—do you ask ‘why’? Well, I will tell you why.
You see, the child lives. Instead of the wind he hears the sound of angels singing before My throne. Instead of the beauty that passes he sees everlasting Beauty—he sees My face. He was created and lived a short time so the image of his parents imprinted on his face may stand before Me as their personal intercessor. He knows secrets of heaven unknown to men on earth. He laughs with a special joy that only the innocent possess. My ways are not the ways of man. I create for My Kingdom and each creature fills a place in that Kingdom that could not be filled by another. He was created for My joy and his parents’ merits. He has never seen pain or sin. He has never felt hunger or pain. I breathed a soul into a seed, made it grow and called it forth.”
I am humbled before you, my Lord, for questioning Your wisdom, goodness, and love. I speak as a fool—forgive me. I acknowledge Your sovereign rights over life and death. I thank You for the life that began for so short a time to enjoy so long an Eternity.
-- Mother M. Angelica